do I need drivers ed?

Well..... now that this weekend has passed, my favorite month is almost over :( and now I have nothing to look forward to for a loonngg time! The next few months will be nothing more than Blah...

On saturday I had to take my driving test over... We have some stupid law here that if your license are suspended for more than six months you must take the test again.. Like people forget how to drive in six months. Well, needless to say I was nervous. I know that I know how to drive, but I did have it in the back of my mind that I was going to fuck up on the manoverability (sic)... Then to make it worse, the way the new DMV is here, the wall facing the testing area is all windows so everyone was watching.. (which of course made me more nervous). I wouldn't want to walk back in there after they all just watched me fail...

So I'm sitting in my sisters car watching the girl before me fail horribly, as the knots in my stomach are growing by the second... When its finally my turn the instructor gets in and tells me to pull forward... I go, then I put the car in reverse... At this point I was soo nervous. Then I did it... I mistook the gas for the break and slammed right into the side of this Ford Explorer. SHIT! The whole back of my sister little Nissan Sentra was completely under this monster of a truck.. The instructor didn't know what to do, she just had this look of WTF?!?! on her face... Obviously I was too embarrassed to even speak.. I thought I might fail, but this never crossed my mind. How did I just do that? I remember mistaking the peddles before but I have never actually fucked up this badly before. For some reason I hit that gas so fast that we just flew back... Shit, what was I gonna do... I never heard of anyone causing an accident taking the test before..

Oh, by the way- I'm just kidding! I passed with a perfect score. But ya gotta admit that I had you going there for a while huh? Ha ha ha....

Let me sleep....

PAM!!!!! Hello....

I hear as my eyes slowly peel open from my deep sleep... WTF?!!? who could be at my house at 7 am waking me up? I'm sick and I need all the sleep I can get! Obviously I must have been in too deep a sleep to hear them pounding on my door.

I cautiously get out of bed. Hmmm.. Should I even attempt to answer it? remembering the crazy dream I had last night. The nyquil I have been taking is like taking acid before going to sleep. The dreams are so vivid and realistic. Last night I dreamt that the guy across the hall from me broke into my house, but not to steal anything, just to scare the crap out of me. As I walked into my house, none of the lights worked. After realizing something wasn't right I ran outta there! And as I was looking at the window I could see his reflection run back to his house. Then of course there was the whole fight scene...

Anyway...

As I step out of my bedroom I could see a hand sticking though a gap in my doorway trying to unhook the chain lock that I always have locked when I'm alone. I have always had a fear of someone breaking in, or already being in when I get home. My heart drops... could this be happening... Yes! it was A... (he has a key) I groggily open the door. Happy Anniversary he says handing me a bouquet of flowers.

What a nice surprise. I wasn't expecting that, and usually he is sooo predictable! Its always nice to wake up and see the person you love! Especially since he has been out of town all week. Unfortunately that will be the only time I see him today. He is tied up tonight and wont be finished until late. We will celebrate tomorrow, but what a nice way to start my day! No wonder I love him... I guess it wouldn't seem that big to some people but we live and work sooo far away from each other. Just knowing he put that much effort to do it means more than any gift could.

Not one year can slip by...

I thought I was clear... I thought I was actually gonna fly under the radar this year... I thought too soon!

I should have known this would happen. I mean I was in a house with 3 sick people all weekend.. What did I expect. Well, I woke up this morning feeling like shit! Nooo.... I don't wanna be sick! I want atleast one winter where I am not sick for weeks and weeks. I thought that with this nice weather we have had so far that this could be the year. Nope.

So here I am, no sick days left since I used them for my trip to vegas and now I am sick. Damn it... I know its from A's daughter. She slept in bed with us last weekend. I remember waking up like 4 times with her coughing in my face. Everytime I woke up we were face to face, our noses practically touching and there she was just coughing away with all her nasty germs going right down my throat! I kept turning my back to her but I guess in my sleep I kept turning back around. WTF...

Now I feel like crap!! My head is pounding, my nose is stuffed on second then running like its in a marathon the next, and my eyes are constantly watering, but the thing that hurts the most is my throat... It is soooo sore. I keep coughing like every 30 seconds. I'm surprised my bosses haven't said anything to me yet. Do they really wanna catch my cooties? I guess so.. I know when I worked for the insurance broker the second I sounded a little congested they made me leave... Luckily there I didn't have sick days and if they made me leave I still got paid.. So all I had to do was show them I was sick one day and I got to stay home until I was "feeling better".. Oh, the good ole days!

I wonder if they are going to make me work tomorrow night? You would think that in a place where I would be handling peoples food and drinks that I wouldn't be able to work if I was sick. Hmm... we'll see.. If I'm lucky this will be gone by tomorrow night. I plan on going home and over dosing on night quill (sic).. Yuk! I hate that stuff... but it works. Its funny because my mom loves it... She actually enjoys taking it. She has problems, I know.

How exciting.....

So when I checked my email this morning, there it was... My first letter from my soldier! Oh, I am so excited. Last week I received his name and email from the company and wrote him an email asking what he would like me to send. His name is Dong Yi, he is Korean. He didn't say much, just that he just turned 19 on Valentines day (too young to be in Iraq if you ask me..) and he mentioned that he fixes their vehicles. So far he sounds really nice, I cant wait to find out more about him! If any of you have the time, please do this. There are so many troops who can use our help with things they cannot get, or just words of encouragement if you cannot afford it. Just letting them know that they are appreciated means so much! The website I went to is www.operationac.com but there are many more out there!

Other than that its been an uneventful weekend for me. A and his son were both sick so I did help out there. Its weird because A doesn't have a cold or anything, some kinda stomach thing. He has had a stomach ache for the last 3 or 4 days. Feeling nauseas, dizzy, and pretty much just like shit. I'm not sure what it is. First we thought it was food poisoning, but that would have went away by now. He doesn't have a fever or anything and no medicine is helping. Guess I will make him a doctors appointment today, the only thing is he is going out of town and wont be back until wednesday or thursday.

Oh, and that girl Amy who left me and C at the bar, well I left her a voice mail that night, and I guess I called her a bitch. She told C that I had no right to say that because she told me that she was leaving. Umm... yeah ok, I knew that she was leaving and just sat there, I enjoy being stranded at 2 am far from home, when I have to be to work the next morning. WTF?! She said I need to apologize.. Ha ha ha, there is no way that I am apologizing!

The end is finally here...

I'm so happy it is friday, I cant wait for today to be over with. It feels like I haven't slept all week. Today wont be much different, I'm just gonna be with A and his kids. It will feel good to just sit around though. Tomorrow night I have to work, so that means I'll be able to sleep in on Sunday. I'm hoping atleast until 11, then I get to do laundry.. sounds fun huh?

So C finally had sex with that guy. Well, actually he is her boyfriend now. She said it wasn't as bad as she had anticipated, but he still needs to learn a little more. We'll see how long this relationship is gonna work. I can tell that he does some things that bother her and for some reason she wont talk to him about them. Stuff like going through her cell phone, and always having to be all over her (touching, hugging, laying on her). The touching part is okay when you're out but when you're just sitting at someones house with like 6 friends it gets old. I told her things like that are just gonna get more annoying with time, but she said that she doesn't want to bring it up cause he gets mad... She'll realize soon enough that it needs to be resolved now, or else she will just start to resent him for doing those things.

As for my love life, well things are going great! Our anniversary is next week. We don't have any big plans but we hopefully will be celebrating the finalization of his divorce. Its been hard on both of us trying to move forward with out relationship but having to deal with that. His ex can be a bitch! and she just makes it that much harder!! She has always made such a big deal about him having a girlfriend. I understood that... But its not like they are getting divorced because of me; it was already happening when I came into the picture. Anyway, so now A just found out that she has been dating some guy... she was only holding me over his head to get more money out of him.. People get so ugly and greedy during divorces. She assumed A would never find out about her bf and was completely shocked when he told her he knew... Thats when she finally agreed to the settlement. So now that everything is agreed upon hopefully this will all be over within the next month! You have no idea how long I have been waiting for this! To finally see all the hurt A has went through-stop. Things sure haven't been easy for him, and I know this will be a ton just lifted off his shoulder...

Reap what you sow?

In most places in America and for most people that is how life is...

But of course my life has to contradict everything!

I've never denied where I came from, I've tried to always remember my past because it has made me the person that I am today. There are few people with whom I still speak to though, few people I feel are "worthy" of my friendship... There are times when I feel like I have turned my back on certain people because they are not good for me. I feel selfish, and like I act brand new... I know I am not, I know where I came from and just because my life is better now doesn't mean that I will ever forget how it was. I don't feel the way I do today because I think I am better than anyone, I am not! I feel this way because it is the truly the only way to not get sucked back into that type of life. I have to feel that way in order to be a better person for me...

Okay, a little off the subject but anyway...

Last night I went out with C. Nothing to big just to dinner then to play some pool. Everything was going good. C decides that she wants to hang out with this girl Amy. Amy is my friend D's sister. I've known her for ever just never really hung out with her, but C goes out with her all the time. At first everything was fine, we were all having fun then C wants to leave where we were at to go to the most ghettoist bar (yeah, I know that's not a word!) on the west side of Cleveland to check up on one of our friends bfs.

We were only supposed to be there for maybe 10 minutes. The next thing I know Amy is calling C asking where we are, cause she left the bar (she was our ride because I wont drink and drive). This bitch left us there!!! Fucking whore! But that isn't the worse part...

See, I've come to acceptance about who my ex is and what he did. There are a lot of people who don't like him, and in turn don't like me (even though we haven't been together for 2 years) Well it just so happens that some of these guys are at this bar, and it just so happens that they realized who I am. So while on top of trying to find a ride, I have this drunk ass guy telling me...

" I know who you are, but don't worry I'm not going to tell my friends.... But just so you know you should watch your back coming around here.. you realize what could happen to you, what these guys would be willing to do"

WTF?!!?

Of course he told his friends, so all night I have these guys giving me dirty looks. I had no idea what they were gonna do. I really don't appreciate being threatened, and I hate that I am being threatened because of something that I didn't even do! I mean, why do people have to hate me because of something he did. I know its the whole "if I cant harm him physically, then I'll hurt someone who he loves to harm him emotionally" But that is bullshit!!! I didn't tell him to do what he did, hell I didn't even know until it was done. So why do these wannabe "gangstas" find it necessary to hold me responsible for his mistakes? Fucking bastards! Ughh.... I thought all this bullshit was over with. It has been over 2 years since it all started, cant people just get over shit. Or cant they just hold him accountable for what he did, not me... All this has done is awaken the fear that I have been hiding all this time.

Happy Valentines Day!!!

Hmm... not much to say today, I'm too tired to think.

This second job is really killing me! Last night the other waitress and I cleaned our asses off to get out early, but of course the register was short and for some reason we couldn't leave until is was all sorted out! It ended up being nothing but cost me a precious half hour of sleep! Who knows how long I'll be able to stick in there, but I'm gonna try! the extra money is too good...

Anyway, so C decided to stay with the... umm........ *short* man. ha ha ha.... Hey, what did you expect me to say? there might be kids reading this! I guess she is just going to have to deal with it, maybe for valentines day I should get her a vibrator or a detachable shower head (not sure if that really helps, but from what I have heard it works wonders!) From what I understand they still haven't had sex. She said that they try but he gets so nervous (he's inexperienced) that he either cannot get hard, or one time he just couldn't get it in... hmm... I'm not quite sure what happened there, maybe I should do some investigating and see why he couldn't. I just think its funny that he tried to use the excuse "oh, you're soo tight, I cant get it in" ha ha ha! (guys just so you're aware that is not a good excuse!) not saying that she is a whore or anything its just that she sure aint no virgin! and she has had a baby... and on top of his little problem I don't think that was the reason!

Okay, I need to get off that subject. I feel dirrty talking about that here, don't know why, I just do.

Oh, and today I was doing some research on my zodiac sign (Aquarius) and I read something that was very helpful. You may have noticed that when I did the whole 101 things about me (yeah, I admit it was kinda boring!) that I mentioned one thing that attracts me to men are their ankles.. Well I'm sure some of you were thinking "what the fuck is wrong with this bitch? and I thought I had problems" (screw you!) well, it turns out that each sign has a part of the anatomy attached to it and the anatomical areas for Aquarius are the ankles and calves. Not sure if that means anything but it sounds good at least!

Sunday Night TV.....

I admit it, I am addicted! It is one of my only guilty pleasures....

Desperate Housewives had me hooked last season, but this season I can leave it or take it.. But Grey's Anatomy, oh... I love it!!! The last 2 episodes had soo much going on though. I know they were just trying to hook new viewers since last week it aired after the superbowl, so I understand. I'm just happy that it can go back to normal next week.

I'm not quite sure what it is about this show that has me hooked. I have never really been into any hospital shows before (like ER or scrubs). All I know is I cannot get enough of it...

Okay, back to reality. This weekend was very uneventful. I didn't do anything. I guess I feel kinda bad for being so lazy! I went out on friday with A to this bar by my house which I just found out a girl I used to dance with her bf owns it. Which of course means that all the bartenders there are girls that I used to dance with also. And since they all love me and A soo much * ; ) * they made our drinks really good!!

I didn't really get that drunk but A was wasted, he said he didn't remember anything.

See, this just backs up my theory about someone slipping me something in Vegas, I mean, I drank way more friday than I did in Vegas and I was completely aware of what I was doing and what was going on!

Okay, anyway other than that me and A just stayed in the house with his kids the rest of the weekend. Its only been a couple of weeks since I have actually spent time with his kids. His daughter is at that age where she is just beginning to understand that daddy and mommy aren't going to be together, and I really don't want her to hate me and think its my fault. So far, so good. At first she was kinda hesitant, she wouldn't talk or come near me, but now she has warmed up and I think she might actually like me! Of course she has no idea who I am to her dad and I plan on keeping it that way for a long time. As for his son, he is too young to even understand anything so its all good with him... I like that A has finally opened up this part of his life to me. I mean, I understand why he would be hesitant to, it just feels good that he loves me enough to let me not just meet them but actually spend time with them. I really does mean a lot...

Okay, enough about me.

When did this happen....

I'm gone for 4 days and all hell breaks loose....

I just found out that today that my sister and my brother in law are getting a divorce, at least supposedly. WTF?!?! I cant believe this. They have been married for 9 years, and have an 8 year old son. I'm honestly in shock. I mean, yeah they have had their share of problems and they argue all the time but that is just who my sister is. (she can be a major BITCH!!) she is always complaining about something or someone. I always thought that if someone were to initiate a divorce it would be him because I'm sure he gets tired of her shit. But it wasn't him, it was her. That's why I'm so shocked.

Compared to her past relationships, he is the best guy she has ever been with. The last bf/baby daddy (I just love saying baby daddy) anyway, he was a complete ass! He hardly worked, was always fucked up and beat her. He broke her jaw twice, once they were fighting and he hit her with a 2x4. The second time he pushed her down some stairs. They were together for about 8 years, so this went on for a long time.

Anyway, you would think that she would want to stay with someone who loves her, puts up with her shit, helps to take care of her and her kids... etc. Its kinda sad. He is like the brother that I never had. I'm going to miss him! Hopefully this is just one of those things that will pass over and everything will go back to normal. Well see...

On a lighter note, I'm going on my lunch break to change over the title. Then I still have to get an ames test (sp?) done before I can get the plates, but atleast I have this much done! Yay for me!!

So I told ya'll about me adopting a soldier... Well I thought that by now I would have heard something back, but I haven't. I'm a little disappointed. I hate waiting for things like this. I want it NOW!! bastards are taking too long! Hopefully I get a guy, who's cute, sensitive, funny, charming, has a great personality, understands women.....LOL okay, I'm only joking! I don't care what the person is like, man or woman I am just so excited. I feel like a kid on christmas eve waiting for this stupid website to assign me to someone. Damn them....

Mrs. Irresponsibility has left the building

Okay, she's gone!! I promise!!! dont give me that look.... I'm honestly gonna try! Hey, I'm being serious why are you laughing?

I was soo worried that my boss was gonna be pissed yesterday but he surprised be and wasn't mad at all.... Just said that I need to get it done.

So, even though I only got 3.5 hours of sleep last night since I worked I made myself get up 30 minutes earlier (so actually only 3 hours of sleep) to go to the dmv and start the process of changing it over. The only thing I hate about that is that the title bureau is only open til 4 during the week and 12:30 on Saturday and that is my next step. Damn them, don't they know saturday is my only day to sleep in?! Oh well....

What the hell is up with people not being mad at me lately for stupid things I have done. Not that I'm complaining... I mean, its just a little out of the ordinary. Usually people are mad for stupid reasons and now that they have had a real reason to be mad they're not.. hmm.... guess I should just milk it why I can!

well what else? lets see... oh, I was talking to C yesterday and we were talking about her new bf. I've known this guy for 10-12 years. He's pretty cool, and I guess he is really nice to her. She likes him a lot but they haven't had sex yet... I don't know about you, but I honestly believe that sex is a major part in a healthy relationship. Okay anyway... while I was in Vegas they stayed at my house. Some how they ended up taking a shower together (yeah, still no sex!!) then she saw it.... only about 2-3 inches of.... well... ya know! ha ha ha... 2.5 inches? and no, he wasn't cold! To top it off it was skinny too!!! ha ha ha..... Size does matter guys! to me, not so much length but width.. but if you have neither you're in bad luck!!! So we spent the night going over her options.. What would you do in this situation? leave one of the nicest men you have ever met or stay with someone you know will never fulfill you sexually? Tough Decision... Thank goodness I'm not her!!

ummm...... am I that forgetful???

So far so good.. Things are still looking up for me and A. Hopefully things stay this way!

As for me, well I'm doing good today... I'm in an excellent mood for some reason. I'm sure it will go away soon since I have to work tonight but atleast its here now!

So I went today and signed up to adopt a soldier. I'm pretty excited about it. I never knew there was a program out there like that or else I would have done it a long time ago. I think it's something alot of people should be doing. I mean, the least we can do is support one troop and send them letters and care packages. I cant wait until they assign me someone so I can get the ball rolling.

I also signed up to volunteer with a group call stand up for kids. It pretty much helps kids that are homeless or spend most of their time on the streets. I wont be able to give a lot of time, but I'm sure anything will help...

Oh, but the one bad thing about to day is that I am screwed! the car that I bought a month ago from my boss, yeah, well I forgot to change into my name... So I have been driving it on the plates that were on there. (which of course he didnt know) and now he needs a copy of the new title in my name! FUCK!!! how could I forget something like that? I swear my mind just slips some times... what the hell am I going to do?!?! he is going to be soooo mad at me!! Oh, yeah the bad part is the plates belong to a guy who died a month and a half ago! What the hell is wrong with me lately? How am I supposed to tell my boss that I am that irresponsible?? FUCK!!!

Two wrongs don't make a right....

So I have heard... no seriously, they don't, although some times it might feel as if they do.

Well, were do I begin? Lets see.... the first night in sin city I fucked up badly... I'm actually surprised that the rest of the weekend wasn't effected because of my stupid behavior. To me what happened wasnt as bad as how it must have looked through his eyes, but I do understand why it looked the way it did.

I swear that someone must have slipped something in my drink, I don't remember anything. But I do remember that there was no way I drank enough to be that drunk!!! Everything was going good; we were at the club dancing and the next thing I know some girl pulled me away from A and some other person we were dancing with and started dancing with me. Well her bf and his friend started dancing with us. For some reason I didn't even realize what I was doing. It didn't seem to click that I was dancing with a guy... The four of us went to the bar to get a drink and the next thing I know one of the guys kissed me (he kissed me!)... The kiss lasted maybe a couple of seconds and there was NO tongue, but that was just enough for A to see. I don't know why I didn't move away faster... I honestly have no idea what I was thinking. ( just go ahead and tell me how horrible I am... I deserve it!)

Lets just say that that night didn't go very well... I tried so hard to explain to A what happened but I couldn't because I didn't even really know what happened. The next morning I felt so horrible. I told him that I understood why he was mad, there was no way to justify what I did and I would do anything to be able to take it back. Of course that didn't mean much, but I didn't know what to say, I couldn't even look him in the eyes because I felt like such a whore. That is not who I am, and that is not the type of person I want A to see me as. Of course he was mad, and that made him say that maybe I am a slut and just did a good job at making him believe that I am not. It hurt to hear him say that... but i deserved it... I don't want him to think that everytime I go out I dance with guys and let them kiss all over me. I don't!! I don't want him to doubt my loyalty to him... but Im sure he does now.

Later on that day everything just seemed to go back to normal. Like everything that had happened was forgotten. I'm not sure why though. Maybe he realized that I really didn't kiss that guy or maybe this is his excuse to level everything off between us with that horrible lie he told. I don't know. And as much as I want to ask, something is telling me to wait a while so he has time to cool off. I'm so afraid that if I bring it up now, he will not be so forgiving... I'm sure this has made him look at me differently, now his trust for me is probably gone. It feels like we just took 15 steps back in our relationship... Everything was finally getting back to normal, and now I had to fuck it up. I think... okay I'm not sure.. the fact that he didn't stay mad really has me confused, I don't know what to expect.

Well anyway, the rest of the trip was good... we just walked the strip, went to some bars, he gambled and that was about it. We ended up having to leave early because of some things happening back here in cleveland, it sucked but it was only one night early.

Was it worth it? of course not. But there isn't anything I can do to change what happened. Hopefully he can be as understanding as I have been and put this all behind us...

Am I honestly supposed to?

Why is it people always feel the need to ask... "do you feel any older?"

What do they expect you to say? Yeah, I feel about 1 minute older than I did two minutes ago. Now that I have been 22 for a whole 5 minutes I can feel my metabolism slowing down, my arthritis kicking in, and my hair turning grey!

Okay, I know I'm really making no sense at all but that's okay. I'm working on 4 hours asleep for the second time this week. When I'm tired I just ramble on and on. I have but one drop of energy in my body and I need to save that for all the packing and laundry I have to do tonight. Of course I didn't pack already... you actually thought I was serious when I said I was going to pack on Tuesday? Don't you pay any attention?
I am the procrastinator! *said in my best arnold schwartzenegger voice* (which isn't very good, but hey I tried!)

Okay, someone just tell me to shut up, I 'm annoying myself! Ahh.. I need sleep! Lucky for me I have a 9 am flight tomorrow so hopefully I will catch up on my lost visits from the marshmallow man as babs would say. Damn, now I have that stupid ghostbuster song stuck in my head!

Who ya gonna call.. dananana dananana.....

Oh, and I went today and bought some of those chaser hangover pills. Figured that I can try them out and hopefully they will work that way I wont be sick all weekend.

Okay, I need to stop typing, my thoughts are everywhere and if they arent making sense to me I can just imagine how they sound to you.. Have a great day!

Well I'll be back o Tuesday to fill y'all in on all the good things that happen this weekend...

My honey.....

Another boring day in the office...

With a lot of people talking about their furry friends I'm gonna tell ya'll about my cat honey..

Oh, how I loved her! she was my favorite animal ever... I got her when she was 4 weeks old and for the first 3 weeks that I had her I was grounded (hey, I was only 15) so I was constantly with her. We became very close and whenever I was in the house she was either on my lap, walking next to me, or hitchin a ride on my shoulders. When I slept she was always sleeping across my neck, and she would nibble on my ears.

As she started getting older she acted like a dog.. She played fetch, she would let me take her for walks on a leash (she was an indoor cat) and she even learned a couple tricks. We were so compatible, I guess me raising her made her personality just like mine. Everyone that ever met her said that she acted and had an attitude just like mine. We were inseparable.

In the house that I lived in my mother and her bf "lived" in the basement. They had it set up like a separate apartment for themselves so me and my sister would never be bothered with them. They had one of the rooms separated my a couple blankets to keep the heat in.

One night I had just gotten home and lied down on the couch for a minute. My sister was asleep in her bedroom and her bf J was in my room on the internet along with honey. He was in my room smoking weed so he would put a wet towel under the door so the smoke/smell wouldn't fill the whole house. Unknown to him the basement had caught on fire, and on top of the normal smoke, there was an exceptional amount of more thick smoke due to the blankets catching fire. I have no idea why the smoke detectors didn't go off, they worked! Even the fire department said they weren't sure what happened.

Anyway, the whole house was filled with this thick black smoke except for my bedroom, and by this time my sister and I were both pretty much unconscious due to smoke inhalation. I guess my cat honey started flipping out. She was pretty much crying, running around, doing all she could to get J's attention. At first he just ignored her thinking that maybe she just wanted to play, but after awhile he just decided to lock her out of the room cause she was being "annoying". When he opened the door that's when he seen the smoke. It took him about 5 -10 minutes to finally get us conscious to where we were able to get out of the house. Lucky for us the fire was contained in the basement.

That was probably one of the scariest moments of my life. Waking up and not being able to see anything except smoke. I remember hearing J trying to wake up my sister R and her not understanding.. all she kept saying was I am awake over and over... But while I was hearing this I couldn't bring myself to wake up. I could hear everything going on but I couldn't move or open my eyes. Nothing felt real, it all seemed like a dream!

After the fire truck came and the fire was out, all I could think about was honey. She jumped out of the window when they busted it to spray the water... I searched and searched and I was so afraid that I wouldn't find her when all of a sudden she came running from behind the garage and just jumped into my arms. She started purring and licking the sut off of my face.

Thank god everyone was okay, but the medics said that if my sister and I would have been in the smoke for a couple more minutes we might have died from the smoke inhalation. It was scary to hear that. But to know that I lived because of honey was a great feeling, who knows what might have happened if she wouldn't have been there.

A couple years later when I was moving my new apartment wouldn't except cats. I tried so hard to find a place that would, but I ran out of time. I had to take her to a shelter ( I found a no-kill shelter). Leaving her there that day was soo hard. I had to act like she was a stray in order for them to take her, so I couldn't cry. As soon as I stepped foot out the door I remember the tears just came running down my face. Even just writing about it brings tears to my eyes now..

I love my cats now, but they will never compare to honey!